18December 2021
All right, let's give this a go. I was always a small kid, like an incredibly small kid. This is me with my third grade Sunday School class. (By far the shortest.) Having everyone head and shoulders above me as a kid, including the girls? Not good for my self-esteem. In fact, I didn't reach five foot until freshman year. I know what it's like to feel small. There exists an entire industry dedicated to helping people combat their insecurities of shortness. They call them "elevator shoes". They're simple– a shoe with thickened insoles to increase the height of the wearer, with some pairs promising an extra two inches up to six inches, There's an option for everyone. So of course, you already know I'm gonna get myself some Ba-ba-ba-ba! Guys, it came. It came in the mail. Now is the time. I am so excited to open this box! All right! Two big boxes. So I believe this is a three inch increase model and this is the six inch increase model. We'll open up the three inch first. Here goes nothing. I'm hoping for that new shoe smell.
YOOOO! Individually wrapped! Like my girl Little Debbie. Okay, here we go! That isn't so bad. That is not as noticeable as I imagined. THREE EXTRA INCHES. (wheeze) You can see that the edge of the shoe is very high up. I get how this works. Let's see these things actually work, guys. (laughing, wheezing) WOOOAAAH, that feels really bizarre! How do they look? Natural? WOAH (laugh/wheeze) This is the whole new world. I've entered a new dimension. I see new colors. Is this like really obvious? So now we're going about the six inch height increase shoes. And here they are. Oh man! WOAH, OKAY! (more wheezing) WOAH! You guys, These are intense! That is like the weirdest looking shoe, I have- like- what is that? So I guess now it's time to see if these things actually work- I don't know why they wouldn't work, I can literally see the chunkiness.
Here we go. One shoe on, other shoe on, here I go. OH!? Is this this like is this legal? I mean like it's pretty obvious, Is it not? I'm nearly 6 feet in these shoes, And the funny thing is is I'm pretty sure that's the average height for a man, So, me wearing these really outrageous, bulky shoes, makes me the height of the average man I mean, honestly, that's not that obvious, like, I could get away with these right? Woah, I'm stepping outside. I'm outdoors for the first time as a normal height person. This is bizarre. The hardest part initially was learning how to walk being 3 inches taller. Mikey: Don't look so unnatural! Luke: It's so hard! It's strange, relearning a task that you've always known how to do, not to mention the fact that it hurt. It's hard and it hurts! How am I going to do this for an entire week? Mikey: You're walking like they're heels! Luke: How does it feel to be so short? Mikey: I don't know Luke: I'm so tall! Now it was time to actually step out in public.
I am walking into a store. It felt really awkward being taller. I couldn't help but think that everyone was staring at me, even though nobody even cared. And yeah, I'll admit it. I was embarrassed. Yes, I get embarrassed by things. I'm like really really embarrassed for some reason. I feel like it's really obvious. (quietly, laughing) this is really bad I know this is just my imagination, but everyone is staring at my shoes! They know! You know what sucks most about this is I'm still like shorter, than everyone. Yeah, it's safe to say that the 3 extra inches didn't make me feel any more confident. Yet. So after a full day of getting used to the shoes, I wanted to see if the people who knew me best would notice a difference.
I'm now headed to dinner with my manager. We'll see if he notices. Manager: Guys, it's fake, it's fake it's all staged. Action! Luke: Notice anything different? Manager: What's wrong? Did you get taller? (Luke wheezing) Manager: Let me see! Take it off! (laughing) Luke: So yes. 3 extra inches is enough for people you know to notice. Mikey: Woah that's weird, cause you're really tall now! Manager: Ughh (laughing) Luke: How they saw me differently being taller, I'm not quite sure. But the fact that they even noticed? Says a lot. Alright! Tell me if you notice anything different. Girl: Okay. Luke: Notice anything different? Girl: Yeah, you're taller. Luke: Yes! Do they look natural? Did you say no? Girl: No! Luke: They don't?! Girl: (laughing) No! Luke: (laughing) Oh no! NO! So I've been wearing the shoes for about 48 hours, and I think I've officially mastered the art of walking normally in elevator shoes.
Did you see that walk? That was a good walk. And I'll be perfectly honest, now that I know how to walk, and I feel comfortable, It honestly feels pretty good to have an extra three inches. And I don't know how I feel about the fact that I feel that way, if you know what I mean. All right, we're headed to a movie. In the shoes. So yeah, I was doing it! I was living life normally as a taller guy. No one even knew the difference. And although it wasn't my natural self, It was hard to not feel good about being taller. I just feel more powerful! I've always wanted to be taller, and finally I was taller. And I haven't even tried the 6-inchers yet. Good morning guys, it's another day. Today, I'm going to break these bad boys out.
The 6-inch SHOES! If I thought walking around three inches taller was crazy, today is about to be super crazy. (laughing/wheeing) What?! (laughing) What is going on?! Woooaaaaahhhh! (laugh) I don't think this is my look, but we're gonna rock it anyway. Open your eyes. (laugh/wheeze) Guy: (laugh) Hello?? Luke: Notice anything different? Guy: (laughing) Wait, what are those? Luke: Cool, right? Hey guys, so I'm hitting the town in my six inchers. I feel Absolutely ridiculous. But you know it is it is what it is! I'm almost 6 feet tall now. So, I'm essentially walking around La with high heels on. Look how much taller I am than Mikey. Mikey: Daaamn Luke: So wearing the six-inch shoes did absolutely nothing for my confidence I felt far too not like myself to enjoy them, or maybe it's just because they looked like this: I'll never really know. But hey, at least I now know that being nearly six foot tall isn't really for me. I felt like an awkward horse too big for my own good. But honestly? The 3 inch shoes I didn't mind so much So today is officially the last day, of wearing the elevator shoes and let me just say, this has been an experience.
Probably mainly psychological, but I really do feel like people are paying more attention to me. I stick out slightly more in a crowd. I'm more easily noticed. I am treated more as a man. I really do feel, as that I am treated differently. So this conclusion is kind of bizarre, because I was not expecting it to be this way. So yeah, maybe I learned that I do feel good when I'm 3 inches taller, but I don't think this is gonna change how I see myself.
Cause there are plenty of things that I could pick and choose about myself that I'd like to change, and I say if it makes you feel better about yourself, then go for it! But me personally? I'm gonna try to rock being 5 foot 6, and try to be as confident being a shorty little man-boy as I would be, with 3 inch height increasing shoes. It is time that I officially retired the elevator shoes. Elevator shoes, thank you for the lesson, but it is time I say goodbye. This is where you will sit for the rest of your life to serve as an example to everybody who steps foot into this bedroom! Elevator shoes, I dub thee, free, of all your duties.
(Epic tune) (laughing).